The First edition of The UK Lyme Times ( a tribute to Keith Floyd)
Welcome to the first ever edition of The UK Lyme Times. I decided that after having Lyme disease for 19 years, and only now starting to receive treatment, I should log all my thoughts, frustrations and treatment status to other people suffering from this terrible illness.
I was wondering how I should address fellow sufferers of this disease and decided that in honour of the wine swilling cook Keith Floyd who coined the name "Gastro-Noughts" for people interested in food, but having no chance of ever having their thoughts published, I will collectively refer to us as Lyme-O-Noughts. Please go to this link if you do not know what Lyme Disease is...http://www.ilads.org/
So Lyme-O-Noughts, I will not bore you with the long list of symptoms I have suffered from, they read more like the doomsday book than a medical condition, but I will struggle to verbalise the treatment and how it affects me day to day. I am living in London where this disease is not at all well known. I have been in a monumental battle to have this recognised for the last 7 years I have been back in the UK. Finally last Friday after years of battling with hospitals and GP's I was diagnosed with Chronic Lyme Disease and placed on 300mg of doxycycline for 6 months (to start with). For anyone in this battle you have my full support and empathy, for years I have been told I have "a rare form of Basilliar Migraine" "atypical Angina" "mini-strokes" to them even asking my mother (bare in mind I am 38 years old) " Was she prone to tummy aches and drama as a child, perhaps a lobotomy that you are unaware of??"
Anyway I am on the second day of antibiotics and as yet have had no side effects, but I know that this is the calm before the storm. I got Lyme disease when I worked as a camp counsellor in a Northern Californian Summer Camp, not knowing what it was I was sent on my merry way, and 9 months after my tick bite was plagued with erroneous strange medical complaints that have lasted almost 2 decades.
I have had heart surgery and god knows what else. I have cost the NHS a small fortune, as I have constantly said all I need is antibiotics and not the colonoscopy whose tube could have seen my tonsils it was that long. It was like something out of Alien versus predator. Nurse Hatchet who administered said garden hose seemed to have a rather unnatural joy from it. This led me to this question “Do all NHS colon nurses or doctors enjoy their jobs a little too much?”
Anyway Lyme-O-noughts I am digressing from the point. I wanted to set up a website (if only I knew how) to sell tick shaped piñatas for the discerning American Lyme patient for all those holiday needs. All you need do is fill the Piñata with Gingko Biloba for memory loss, Glucosamine for joint pain and signed photographs of Hall and Oates…Poor Darryl…
This blog is also dedicated to the poor partners, parents and friends of Lyme-O-Noughts as they suffer along with us every step of the way.
The worst thing for me is the memory loss. I was at the pharmacist yesterday and was blankly staring at my prescription as I could not remember my address, she was smiling kindly yet hidden behind those eyes flashed the thought from her that I might actually be insane.
A little thought to share, don’t let your partners in on the Lyme disease memory scam…they say “Did you do that washing up or what??” You meekly answer in a barely audible voice that echoes from the pit of despair that you are immersed in “ Me, what, what washing up, Did I, I think I did, anyway who the hell are you, and what are you doing in my domicile wearing those marigold gloves?”
Marigold gloves for our discerning American readers are rubber gloves that are really really yellow and protect the partners hands from the ravishes of washing up soap (as apparently we don’t remember to wash the dishes…back to the old Lyme Disease Memory Scam or LDMS..wink wink)
I lived in San Francisco for 12 years and want to ask any Americans who are still actually reading this for a huge favour( My queen will festoon you with the wishes of the monarchy) but she will not honour the Americans who have wandered in here by accident but are actually looking for Busty Morgan Does Lyme Connecticut. That’s now available on a double DVD. Also the bras she uses are on loan to the British War Museum as exhibits from the collection of Barnes Wallace.
Anyway my revered cousins who can tell me the name of that marshmallow stuff that’s in a jar and closely resembles paint??? Any answers on a self addressed envelope please…you home is at risk if you do not keep up your repayments on it….courtesy of Borrelia Tickers…oops digressed again sorry…
Anyway L-O-N’s I will bid you farewell for now, and if by some slim chance you decide to visit me again in my quest to rid myself of this tick affliction I can tell you that next week in the UK Lyme times…..
The Lyme Celebrity….who has the disease and who’s just faking it…….The Lyme poll…50 worst medical investigations and those who have endured them…also don’t forget we have a 3 page photo shoot on Ticks….Ticks in bikinis…and don’t forget the tick poolside shoot( Might be a bit racy for our older Lyme-O-Noughts.
There is a special article with Derek Acorah….on paranormal tick infestations….” Thank you Sam….ooh evey I’m feeling he’s a bad un” Once again for our American visitors Derek Acorah is a well rewoned spiritualist medium who often becomes possessed by evil entities whilst on location around great Britain (he’s from Liverpool, but he cant help that) See his website http://www.derekacorah.org/ For my UK L-O-N’s why the hell has Derek paired up with Daniella Westbrook???? She’s hardly medium of the century is she????? Answers please as I am confused by this travesty.
Ta Ta for now L-O-N’s
Kathy XXXXX
I was wondering how I should address fellow sufferers of this disease and decided that in honour of the wine swilling cook Keith Floyd who coined the name "Gastro-Noughts" for people interested in food, but having no chance of ever having their thoughts published, I will collectively refer to us as Lyme-O-Noughts. Please go to this link if you do not know what Lyme Disease is...http://www.ilads.org/
So Lyme-O-Noughts, I will not bore you with the long list of symptoms I have suffered from, they read more like the doomsday book than a medical condition, but I will struggle to verbalise the treatment and how it affects me day to day. I am living in London where this disease is not at all well known. I have been in a monumental battle to have this recognised for the last 7 years I have been back in the UK. Finally last Friday after years of battling with hospitals and GP's I was diagnosed with Chronic Lyme Disease and placed on 300mg of doxycycline for 6 months (to start with). For anyone in this battle you have my full support and empathy, for years I have been told I have "a rare form of Basilliar Migraine" "atypical Angina" "mini-strokes" to them even asking my mother (bare in mind I am 38 years old) " Was she prone to tummy aches and drama as a child, perhaps a lobotomy that you are unaware of??"
Anyway I am on the second day of antibiotics and as yet have had no side effects, but I know that this is the calm before the storm. I got Lyme disease when I worked as a camp counsellor in a Northern Californian Summer Camp, not knowing what it was I was sent on my merry way, and 9 months after my tick bite was plagued with erroneous strange medical complaints that have lasted almost 2 decades.
I have had heart surgery and god knows what else. I have cost the NHS a small fortune, as I have constantly said all I need is antibiotics and not the colonoscopy whose tube could have seen my tonsils it was that long. It was like something out of Alien versus predator. Nurse Hatchet who administered said garden hose seemed to have a rather unnatural joy from it. This led me to this question “Do all NHS colon nurses or doctors enjoy their jobs a little too much?”
Anyway Lyme-O-noughts I am digressing from the point. I wanted to set up a website (if only I knew how) to sell tick shaped piñatas for the discerning American Lyme patient for all those holiday needs. All you need do is fill the Piñata with Gingko Biloba for memory loss, Glucosamine for joint pain and signed photographs of Hall and Oates…Poor Darryl…
This blog is also dedicated to the poor partners, parents and friends of Lyme-O-Noughts as they suffer along with us every step of the way.
The worst thing for me is the memory loss. I was at the pharmacist yesterday and was blankly staring at my prescription as I could not remember my address, she was smiling kindly yet hidden behind those eyes flashed the thought from her that I might actually be insane.
A little thought to share, don’t let your partners in on the Lyme disease memory scam…they say “Did you do that washing up or what??” You meekly answer in a barely audible voice that echoes from the pit of despair that you are immersed in “ Me, what, what washing up, Did I, I think I did, anyway who the hell are you, and what are you doing in my domicile wearing those marigold gloves?”
Marigold gloves for our discerning American readers are rubber gloves that are really really yellow and protect the partners hands from the ravishes of washing up soap (as apparently we don’t remember to wash the dishes…back to the old Lyme Disease Memory Scam or LDMS..wink wink)
I lived in San Francisco for 12 years and want to ask any Americans who are still actually reading this for a huge favour( My queen will festoon you with the wishes of the monarchy) but she will not honour the Americans who have wandered in here by accident but are actually looking for Busty Morgan Does Lyme Connecticut. That’s now available on a double DVD. Also the bras she uses are on loan to the British War Museum as exhibits from the collection of Barnes Wallace.
Anyway my revered cousins who can tell me the name of that marshmallow stuff that’s in a jar and closely resembles paint??? Any answers on a self addressed envelope please…you home is at risk if you do not keep up your repayments on it….courtesy of Borrelia Tickers…oops digressed again sorry…
Anyway L-O-N’s I will bid you farewell for now, and if by some slim chance you decide to visit me again in my quest to rid myself of this tick affliction I can tell you that next week in the UK Lyme times…..
The Lyme Celebrity….who has the disease and who’s just faking it…….The Lyme poll…50 worst medical investigations and those who have endured them…also don’t forget we have a 3 page photo shoot on Ticks….Ticks in bikinis…and don’t forget the tick poolside shoot( Might be a bit racy for our older Lyme-O-Noughts.
There is a special article with Derek Acorah….on paranormal tick infestations….” Thank you Sam….ooh evey I’m feeling he’s a bad un” Once again for our American visitors Derek Acorah is a well rewoned spiritualist medium who often becomes possessed by evil entities whilst on location around great Britain (he’s from Liverpool, but he cant help that) See his website http://www.derekacorah.org/ For my UK L-O-N’s why the hell has Derek paired up with Daniella Westbrook???? She’s hardly medium of the century is she????? Answers please as I am confused by this travesty.
Ta Ta for now L-O-N’s
Kathy XXXXX
posted by Big Brothers Big Lesbian @ Sunday, January 29, 2006
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